Deciding to become a house-wife in any cultural fold in the present day world is no big deal. Let’s be pragmatic and let’s admit the fact that gone is the days when the girl had to be docile and demure, with coyness and silence to mark her character. People no longer have such primitive expectations and things are changing radically even in the rural areas. Contrary to what some media channels and concerns strive to make you believe that housewives in India or from Indian families are leading a jailed life, the truth is a huge departure from these canards, spread by people with vested interests.
And, no other women are as liberated and independent as the Bengali housewife. If you study recent reports or researches, you’ll find the surge in professional peaking from married Bong women. In Bengali Matrimony, a very good thing is that you’re allowed to pursue your studies if you marry early. Many girls, who marry before their graduation or degree or career zenith, get the support of her in-laws and husband to chase her goals albeit total footing in the family and commitment to the marriage. But it’s two sides of a coin and there are both benefits and demerits of the same.
- Independence and rise to fallout: You need to know that Bengali men are known to be close to their mothers. The mothers have a feeling that their son would always be under their hold. Any move here or there, they tend to think that their attachment is falling out or she’s gradually losing her grip over her son. This authority comes from the upbringing, her parentage and the social system of a certain generation. The bad thing is that the housewife is held responsible automatically for this change. As the girl in the family, you need to be patient and make her understand that he loves her still that much. It’s you who often have to adapt to a large number of changes and dictates, or make attempts to bridge the gap.
- Coping with unrealistic expectations: Though on the downslide, in-laws still tend to expect that as housewife, you’re meant to run errands for the family. Yes, the benefit is that people nowadays give you much authority over household matters. But, like every other gamut, it has its pitfalls as well. When you’re asked to pay a bill or collect something, it might be a regular trend. Even if you have problems or are sick, there will be this feeling that you will or should do the job. You have the liberty to call shots in the kitchen or ration work, but again you share the liabilities too.
- Being free doesn’t mean being always available: This is a popular pre-conceived notion that you find mostly in a Bengali Matrimony. You will have the liberty to hold tuition classes at your place or teach at other places occasionally, but the timings might become an eyesore eventually.
Many times, you have to hold these classes at home so that you can attend to the domestic chores and teach or learn simultaneously. That’s the thing that comes with being a housewife in Bengali family.
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